My abuse experiences

After a request for a consolidated account of what I at this time remember about my abuse, here goes.


Abuse at home by enemy of the family  at age 3 1/2  or 4

Acted out some of  what I experience at age 5  with 7 year old girl on my estate,  got called dirty pervert by ‘adults’

Placed in ‘reform school’  at age 5  after that bullying together with  other bullied kids, often victims of racism.  Also  autistic and otherwise minor disabled kids were present.

Remember being encouraged to do a weird dance and pat my bum, thought that was strange at the time.     Also refused to have my testicles examined  by ‘a doctor’   I noticed he was not wearing a doctors coat.

Recently remembered seeing and insulting Cyril Smith down Walthamstow  market.  Got told I was a naughty little boy and would be punished.    Got brought here   and warned


At some point in 1986  I was taken by a staff member to the junk shed at the end of my school playground after being promised a ride on a plastic toy train set.   I was teased for still liking to ride it,  but still liked to.   After entering the shed the man punched me in the stomach,  while winded he undressed and raped me.   He got up and I layed on the ground for a while untill I was called over to where he went by a woman’s voice. I went over and saw her, the rapist and another man.  I recognised the other man as also working at the school.  I grabbed the second mans testicles and squeezed them,  the rapist then hit me several times.    I remember becoming dizzy, maybe passing out.      The next thing I can remember is the 2 men masterbating into a glass, the woman held a book and seemed to be directing them,  after they ejaculated she mixed the mens sperm and masturbated herself.    I was then handed the glass and told to drink it,   I acted more scared than I was so they would not suspect what I had already planned.   I threw the glass at the woman after it being handed to me.     I got hit again.    They then began to search through the book  and decided on something else.  They drew a pentogram on the floor with chalk and placed the book face up on the ground turned to a picture of Pan ,  I think they beat me up badly before they began in order that I would comply,  again I was scared but acted more scared to fool them,  when they knelt me to the picture I turned around and did a shit on the picture.




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